| - Sweet Child O' Mine  Holy shit, I haven't written in a LONG time. A lot of crap has changed, both good and bad...At the moment I am at the wonderful hell hole that people call ALP (Alternative Learning Progam) AKA Greenvale Boces. I mean it's pure bullshit, but it works. Gabe and I broke up wayyyyy back. I guess it's for the better, I mean I wasn't happy when it happened and shit, but what can a person do? *DRAMA* happens every day at this stupid school, so you kind of have to put your foot down and turn your head...Which Ashley & Stephanie help me with so I'm REALLY glad about that
I really thought for awhile that I wouldn't be happy for awhile after me and him broke up, I mean we dated for so long and he made me so happy and everything, and then me and Doron went out for a little. I tried to like him and see him, but all I wanted to do was crawl under my covers and hope one day that Gabe and I would get back together and everything would be fixed...but that never happened. Doron and I broke up and I stayed inside a lot over Christmas vacation, but then the most *AMAZING* thing happened
For awhile I had been talking to this guy from my school named Rob, and we had *really* been hitting it off. (I had liked him even before he had been dating my ex-best friend Laurie, but I didn't want to say anything), but on New Years Eve he and I had decided to hang out, so he came to the house, and met my parents....AND THEY ACTUALLY REALLY LIKED HIM. My dad shook his hand and shit and smiled when we left...in his 1986 white camaro « smiles so much I can't control it » and we went to his house along with his friend Dandre. We hung out..smoked a couple of blunts and bowls and just chilled. Rob and I went outside for a cigg, and we were cuddling at 11:56pm when I told him how I had liked him and everything since the beginning of the year, and he told me too and asked me out...and then we *kissed* when it turned midnight I WAS SO FUCKING HAPPY YOU HAVE NO IDEA!!! Finallyyyyy I had found someone who could take me away from all the school drama and family bullshit, someone who could make me happy. We've been going out ever since and everyday it's like a fucking fairytale. He makes me actually *WANT* to wake up in the morning even when I feel like I have nothing to gain from this fucked up world. I love him so much....I'm finally happy.
I knew that when I came back to school, people (like Doron and Laurie) wouldn't be too happy...and I was right. I lost Laurie as a best friend, and Doron and I aren't on the best of terms.(Actually, he hates me) But in all honesty, I really couldn't give a fuck. Yes, Arielle(Rob's ex from last year) may stalk him by calling him 24-7 and Laurie may try and intimidate me now by "claiming" she's going out with ::Larry Birds son::....HAHA YES THE FAMOUS BASKETBALL PLAYER (which we ALL know isn't true), but that doesn't fucking bother me or him, because we know eachother's feelings, and are totally focused on eachother. He and I hang out *EVERYDAY* after school and I'm finally not afraid to show my emotions or be affectionate towards him...HEHE I AM SO FUCKING HAPPY!And I really don't care that Laurie hates me because I'm dating him. She dumped him because she was cheating on him with his BEST FRIEND, so it's her loss.
I still have my two best friends Ash and Stephanie and they support me 100% and I support them. The bond that I have with them, is almost the same bond that I had with Diva...the kind of sisterly bond that you can NEVER break, because you love them with your dear heart, and you can run to them if you EVER need anything. Yes, I have Darcy and people in school and I have my guy & girl friends out of school, but their different...it's hard to explain.
I still think about my teen tour sometimes, and what everyone is up to these days. In the beginning of tour, I was missing everyone from home like *crazy* I was really upset about Harun..Joe..Lex..Guarav..and Liz(from Harmony) leaving for college. But it's weird now, I hardly talk to any of them now, except for when I'm online the occasional times. Right before I went to England in late August I saw Harun on the LIRR coming back from Manhatten, and I so badly wanted to just run up to him and hug him and just tell him how sorry I was for everything in the past that happened, and how much I cared about him, and how much I was going to miss him as a friend. But things change. I still think about that day, and what I would've said if my mother wasn't there...But now I have Rob and I am SO extremely happy, and he has Alisha and I am SO HAPPY for him, because he deserves to be with someone good for him...But I am dissapointed that I didn't get to spend time with my old great neck "crew" when they were home, because I really did care about them a lot last year.
«sigh» I feel much better that I got all that shit off my chest  Not to mention that I have a fucking snow day today..WAHOOO. My New Years Resolution is that I am going to keep up to date on this fucking thing.
Much Luv...Jess
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I mean for good and bad reasons. Haha me and Rob broke up...Not that it wasn't a bad thing or whatever...But I'm not going to go into it!
...OH and I am not going to Harmony Heights in sept. HELL YEAH!
when Him, Harun, Lex, Joe, Sandy, and Fooden, Elan and Levine came over and we all just chilled at my house. haha how could we forget the chess playing by harun and levinson? ( i swear you guys played scrabble too! lolol) and then the smoking outside and the *pretend* war game playing by harun and joe all over outside on my lawn 
and the snowball fight with me n sandy and then me and harun...I TRIED to get a piggyback ride from harun but *cough* he dropped me *cough* (NOT cool sweetie!) haha..then there was the ickyness cake by my mommy and then the movie NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS and at the same time playing TOOL (aenima). holy shit yo..it like goes RIGHT together it's kinda scary! haha. but that night was like perfect! You couldn't pay me enuf to give me a huge ass sweet 16.
